we were meant to be much more than this....

i think of the times u talked to me, i think of the times u treat me nicely. i think of the times we have heart to heart talk and hide nothing from each other.i think of the times when we used to hang out and laughed our lungs out at the lame jokes we make. i am not asking for worship nor praise, for i am just a mere mortal and have achieved nothing great in life. all i ever wanted is compassion and pure friendship , and is that too much to ask for?
y r v undergoing this process of gradual separation? it is like the electromyogram after administration of acetylcholine or potassium ions, eventually it will approach a straight line with zero amplitude. y is it i find it harder and harder to talk to u each time i saw you? now it has even come to a point where i would just pretend that i never noticed you if i so happen to just pass by. what is happening between us? we're running out of similarities, and the difference between us just piles up everyday. is it my fault to begin with? bcause u were my friend, one that i regard as someone special, whatever u told me, i listened. but then, u weren't thr when i needed someone to talk to.
i feel like thrash, a ragged doll that you play with only when u feel like it or when u need something from me. otherwise, you would just leave me be, only coming back if u need something again. and i don't think that you ever realised that, and you never will. maybe i expected too much from you, knowing how biased and selfish u can be at times. tell me, is this what a friend should do? honestly, you're one of the few good friends that i have, and i duno what to do now. block exams are coming, paired with this , i'm in one of my most vulnerable state of mind. i feel helpless and vague. seriously, i'm at a dead end.