we all have a choice..

a choice to decide how we live our life, a choice to decide the dos and don'ts , a choice of choosing which individuals to be part of our journey, along this vague and lonely road filled with many possibilities and uncertainties.. for most of us, we have a choice to avoid the many unnecessary worries and emotional plague, be it romantically or just between friends. so straight to the point..we have a choice to end our problems, but we're just too stubborn to let go. sometimes, trusting our hearts is more important than relying on the mind~ sometimes the right thing to do is more important than the thing that you want to do. they say, a fool learn from his own mistakes, while a wise man learns from other peoples mistakes. unfortunately , i never seem to learn. i'm neither to begin with. ohh i long for the day when i can finally say that i don't care anymore..being in manipal is so sickening..sickening to the point that i don't think i want to bother with the ppl in my batch anymore (well most people ) >.< an incident happened yesterday, and i'm pretty much pissed about it.. their act were just so immature, and yet they think its fun. noobs... just a bunch of amateur , childish noobs. you people can't even give me the correct definition of fun, on what grounds do you justify that what you guys did was funny? funny is one thing, but whether its necessary or not, or whether it may cause some serious consequences , should be taken into account.. just because you like it and you think its funny, doesn't mean you have to do it.. please do consider the feelings of others. seeing the way you people are, i couldn't help but feel sorry for you.. you may be good in your studies, yes in fact very good, but attitude wise , i would rather give my respects to a kind hearted beggar than giving it to you people. course you ppl just don't deserve it. i hate the sight of the excitement and thrill in your eyes and facial expression, the minute you hear that there is a "drama" going on..and thats not all..why make fun and jokes out of other people's misery? how would you feel if the same was done to you? yes i know you feel terrible.. in fact, i know how sad you can get when the same is done to you..but did you consider the feelings of others when you were happily criticizing and scrutinizing them behind their backs? no~ you never do that.. selfish , just selfish . of all the people that i'm referring to, i don't rly give a damn about them , all except one. but given the current situation, i don't think i can do anything anymore.. i don't want the said person to continue being like this. what would people think of you when they see you the way you are? and sad to say, you're such a hypocrite.. you used to tell me that knowing too much is not good, and yet , i always see that you seek out the gossips and secrets of others. i told myself before, doesn't matter what happens, we'll always be ,at least, friends.. but that sparkle in your eyes and hapiness i observed when you hear that thr is a new drama going on in our batch, that really put me off.. i want you to be a person that is respected by others, or someone that is even worth respecting.. all because, i care about you a lot ..because that what friends genuinely want for each other. but like i said previously, given to whom you are close with, i'm fighting a losing battle, so its time i say, i give up. it never rly was supposed to be a concern of mine anyway . or maybe i just couldn't do it anymore..i think i have repaid all the debts that i owe you before.. its time that i stop feeling that i need to lend a helping hand whenever when you are in need. the way things are rite now, all i can say is i wish you all the best in life~ may your love blossom and work out this time. as long as you're happy, i have no reason not to feel the same for you. however, my instincts tell me that, you and i will be just normal friends at the end of this 5 years course.i want to apologize for 3 things.. i'm sorry , i dunno if i can be your little brother anymore. i cannot sustain the brotherly love i have for you as its just unidirectional. love between siblings and friends require mutual effort to sustain it, and we don't have that. i'm sorry, the nxt time if you happen to have a downfall, i probably won't be there to help you through it. and again i'm sorry, i most probably won't be one of those lucky people to accompany you along this unpredictable journey in life..but just my advice to you, not like you are ever gonna c this post , but do appreciate the other people that are significant in your life. romantic love is crucial , but not to the extend that other forms of love when compared to it , is negligible. if you can ignore your said lifelong friends so many times, what is thr to say for myself? always remember though , apart from your soulmate, there will always be family and true friends out there who cares about you , sometimes even without you knowing it. hold on to them, before you lose them ,as there is no such thing as a 2nd chance.